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April 18 – Universe calling

Weather: nothing worth noting. Same greyness as yesterday.

Time to turn my thoughts to the next big thing: the Kampin Laulu concert on Saturday. This is a good week in the sense that I have nothing else of great importance. For once, I can just concentrate on one thing. I might have a little look at some music for a Spira Ensemble rehearsal on Sunday, but no big stress there.

I managed to squeeze in an extra rehearsal for Kampin Laulu this evening. I want to go through the more straight-forward pieces and leave as much time as possible for tomorrow when the composer of our main piece is present at the rehearsal. I know the choir will be decimated this evening as the event plopped up so late, but it will still be worth it. I just have to keep the fact that not everyone is there in mind and be kind to the ones present:)

The idea of the rehearsal is what I call ‘disarming bombs. Bombs in this case are pieces that feel dangerous and distressing. If you can show that the piece actually is going much better than the singers were afraid it would be, the anxiety caused by these fears disappears and a lot of energy is released. This energy can then be directed towards other challenges in the program. If we get all the first-half pieces to a point where the singers know they will be fine, they will be much calmer and be able to concentrate better on the big Banks piece we will be working on tomorrow.


It was a good rehearsal (actually two, because I had time before the Kampin Laulu rehearsal to drop by at Lumen Valo’s rehearsal and sing some Monteverdi). About 2/3 of the choir showed up and the session was well worth while. Based on this evening, the first half of the Saturday concert will be fine.

Sometimes the Universe sends messages that are strangely poignant. I was listening to the radio whilst driving to the rehearsal. For some reason, I had been annoyed and irritated during the Lumen Valo rehearsal. I don’t think I showed it, but I was probably more quiet and passive than usual – it could be that I was a little nervous about the second rehearsal or already thinking of Saturday’s concert.

The voice on the radio explained about a technique called ‘welcoming’. Shortly, the idea was to accept that one was going through a negative emotion, name it and try to place it one’s body. This was easy, I was feeling irritated and could feel a tightening in my solar plexus. Next, and a little surprisingly, one was to welcome the emotion – accept its existence. And then, once both the mental and the physical side had been accepted, one could let the emotion go, say goodbye to it.

I followed the advice and, lo and behold, it worked. I just let the irritation go and let my body relax. The woman on the radio continued the message from the Universe to me: act only once you have let the emotion go / you can learn to let bigger things like carrying the world on your shoulders go / once you learn how to let go, you can do it on a larger scale. So I let go, and went to the rehearsal relaxed and calm, even happy. I can’t think of a lesson I was more in need of. Thank you, Universe.




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